Grandparents. This word fills us with joy, care, and a warm, gooey feeling, that can only be called love. They are our first friends, protecting us from our parents, secretly giving chocolates, and being the first ones to cheer for us. They are proud of us, and we love them more than anyone else. But, they leave, or do they?
Losing a grandparent leaves a void in the heart that would never get filled. Suddenly, you wake up one day, and don’t find them in their recliner, sipping a cup of tea while watching the news.
Suddenly, you are jolted out of your drowsiness, and you realize what has happened. You break down, tears flowing down your cheeks, thinking, hoping that it turn out to be a joke, that your ‘dada’ is just hiding behind the door, ready to come out in a moment, who would lift you up, and swing you around. But they don’t. Your tears dry up, but they don’t come. Or so we feel.
They never leave, to come back. They are always there, and we just need to close our eyes, to see them standing, waving, and smiling the smile we have always cherished. Yes, they aren’t physically present to hold us, but is tangibility, everything? Doesn’t spiritual mean anything? Has the world so accepted hard, scientific proof, that feelings, emotions and affections been reduced to mere religious tomfoolery? I think not. We feel them around us, for they are around us.
Truth, and Nothing But The Truth
But, it is extremely important to inform us, as children, of their absence. Though it scares us to know that they would never call us, and hug us, it would give us a true realization of what life is, and we would never hold on to illogical, and irrational beliefs.
Also, Capgras syndrome is a real disease, which leaves a lasting, and sometimes depressing impact on the child. Telling the truth, and just the truth, has always helped. It’s like ripping off a band aid. You have to tell your child, that his grandparents aren’t living anymore, but also remember to mention, that they still love him, no matter what.
Omnipresent, and Ever-green
As said earlier, grandparents are omnipresent, and ever present. We find them in things, in conversations, in memories, in food tastes, in perfumes, in a particular joke, while watching a movie.
They are there, just not in body. Their legacy will always remain behind, enlightening their children for years to come, even if they aren’t physically present to do so. It is tough imagining a life without grandparents, but thinking that they aren’t present in your heart, or they don’t love you anymore, would be a grave insult to them.
A Family That Grieves Together, Stays Together
Finally, it is important to understand that such moments require the whole family to come together as one, for everyone needs it. Tragedy has struck, which would require each one to contribute towards coming out of it. It is hard, so hard that people lose hope and fall into depression, but it is important that no one take the blame on themselves, and realize that such is life, and such is it’s cruelty, It is important to understand that they love them, and their own imprints and legacy are left behind through their children.
They aren’t lost; they are just waiting for you at a better place. Remember them, mourn them, cherish their memories, enjoy the moments, remember their smile, their frown, their jokes, their humor, their laughter, their love and their wise, old face, but never demean their memory by thinking that they are lost to eternity. They are just wiling away their time, watching over you, as you keep making them proud.